You are not my best friend


We are currently very firmly in a “best friend” phase.

Everything is based on and related to best friendship. It’s a moniker handed out like a medal if your performance manages to impress the judge and it’s taken away for behaviours that are not wished to be encouraged.

Sharing your ice cream with him, even when he didn’t share his with you, makes you his best friend.

Not being ready to share your ice cream with him even though he didn’t share his with you, makes you not his best friend.

If you say no to pretty much anything that he has asked for, you are most assuredly not his best friend.

He is not above playing off any and all bodies that might be able to get him want he wants, dangling the best friend carrot out as a reward for the first person to do his bidding.

In quieter moments, when nothing is at stake, he might simply have a verbal run through his list of best friends, slowly adding everyone that he has had any recent dealing with to the list, so it’s more a list of personal acquaintances and not exactly his current best best friend.

He’s recently discovered the term girlfriend and this is now also bandied about with little regard for the facts. Sometimes Thomas is his best friend and sometimes he is his girlfriend. Audrey also manages to walk this transgender line with the admiral aplomb that only a 3 year old could manage under such circumstances.

I am pleased to note that I have not been referred to as his girlfriend, I want to believe it’s that there is some inherent understanding of the term but I’m sure that’s just me wearing my biased mother blinkers and attributing intelligence to oversight.

The only thing that I can be sure of is that making decisions that feel to me like being a decent parent means I am often not his best friend.

*Image from


One thought on “You are not my best friend

  1. So funny. We have had similar with both Hannah and Samuel, although we didn’t get the “best” friend, just the “you’re not my friend” if they didn’t get their way!

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